Elopement culture has really grown and become more of a hot topic in a short period of time. All the while, it has taken on a new meaning and become a popular alternative to a traditional wedding.
If you’ve mentioned eloping to a grandparent, they’ve probably assumed something negative and questioned your motives. Maybe they’ve even tried to persuade you into having a “real wedding.” The concept of eloping is completely different today than it was years ago. So long are the days that couples ran off in secrecy to elope. Eloping is not something associated with shame or scandal any longer. Rather, couples have adopted this new way of getting married so that their day actually encapsulates their personalities and is an experience filled with meaning and intimacy.
If you are recently engaged and have considered eloping but really aren’t sure about it, keep reading – the following reasons why you should elope will definitely give you something to think about (;
Reasons Why You Should Elope
1. The day is about you
Countless times I’ve heard past brides talk about their wedding days with regret.
“If I were to do it over, I’d elope.”
I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard those exact words.
Why do so many brides continue to feel this way after their weddings? Sure, people + preferences change, but I don’t think that’s all of it.
After planning for months, sometimes other peoples’ (@ Aunt Shanon) visions tend to take over and you’re so strung out at that point that you just let them. Then, once your day is finally here, you are left with disappointment because other people had a say on what YOUR day was to be like.
Stop what you’re doing and say this out loud:
MY DAY IS ENTIRELY MINE + MEANT TO BE FOR ME + MY (S.O.)
I 1000% give you the permission to take your rightful ownership of your day and create it how you want to remember it. You’re allowed to be “selfish” here. One of the reasons why you should elope is b/c it takes away all that extra fluff and concentrates on the experience instead of a performance for your family and friends to enjoy. You’re left with clear memories of you and your partner coming together, the vows you say, and maybe even a beautiful landscape.
That’s what getting married should really be about.
2. Less materialism, more experience-focused
Despite popular opinion, not all couples are eloping because they can’t afford a traditional wedding. Another myth debunked. Sure, it may work out to be more inexpensive doing it this way than a big wedding, but that’s often besides the point for eloping couples. It’s about recognizing the value in eloping versus a traditional wedding in a church.
When you elope, your whole day is going to be special, instead of an impossible timeline you have to follow. It’s going to be about spending the day with your person and recognizing that this is the beginning of the rest of your lives. You want it to be a memory you’ll never forget and mean it when you say “that was the best day of my life.”
There won’t be stress about the cake, the florist or anything extra normally present at a big wedding. It’s okay if you don’t value the materialistic side of weddings and the production-like theme that sometimes comes along with them. Instead, it will be you and your person – from sunup to sundown and that’s all that matters.
3. Intimacy + meaningfulness
Similarly, eloping is not a sign of laziness. Rather, it often can be an indicator of intentionality. If getting married in a standard wedding venue where countless other couples have said their vows, makes you cringe a little, that’s okay. It may be more fitting for you to design your day in a non-traditional way so that it actually encapsulates you and your boo just the way you want to.
Another one of the reasons why you should elope is because there are no standards or expectations you need to fulfill. You have the freedom to make your day completely unique and meaningful in a way that serves you and your partner best. If you want to get married in the city where you two met, then do it. Make it meaningful.
4. Value photography
One of the reasons to elope is because your photos will be amazinggg.
In a typical wedding day timeline there’s only about 30 minutes (maybe even less) devoted to bride and groom portraits. That’s a dud!
And let’s be honest, those are the photos that you’re going to frame all throughout your house, create an album with and post on every anniversary / appreciation day / birthday. That’s kind of a lot of pressure on your photog to get those special forever memory moments captured in just 25 minutes.
When you elope, you’ll have me there for all the details, ceremony and getting ready moments, yes. Buuut there’s going to be soooo many more opportunities (hours-worth, heck) for you to get those intimate/meaningful/raw/emotion-filled photos that you’ll look at in a few years and begin to tear up because you’ll remember those exact feelings from that moment.
In regards to quality: not only will you get a larger quantity of photos of you and your person, but you’ll also have WAAAY higher quality images. If you’re eloping somewhere gorgeous (hello, yes that’s one of the biggies when it comes to eloping), the beauty of the outdoors around you will be something indescribable. Add in a gorgeous couple and bam! that’s a dang good photo 🤗
Last thing! Because you will have created such an intimate and safe space on your day, you’ll be so relaxed and in love and in the moment that “posing” will be effortless. There will be none of those “oh-I’m-so-awkward-what-do-I-do-with-my-hands” moments. You’ll see none of that, I promise.
5. Not wanting to be the center of attention
Raise your hand if you hate having everyone’s attention 👋🏼
Another reason why you should elope is because it allows for you to be the center of attention without feeling like it! You will naturally cultivate a more intimate and safe space. This will allow you to feel + relish this special experience rather than be overcome with nerves in front of a bunch of people you felt obligated to invite.
6. Too much planning
Again, eloping couples are not lazy! But wedding culture can make you feel unprepared if you are eloping. Ha, just go onto Pinterest and type in “wedding planning.” About a million “wedding planning checklists” pop up. There are so many things to think about when planning a wedding nowadays.
This coincides with how much obligation can be associated with a wedding. Sometimes couples let obligation overcome their vision just because they want everyone to be happy on their day. Often they sacrifice many of their non-negotiables while doing so.
“It will make grandma happy”
“The family will finally be together again”
Not everyone wants to deal with all of that! And it’s okay — if anyone tells you differently, then they’re not seeing your vision. Not all brides love to go sit in a coffee shop all afternoon on a weekend to go through through their wedding planning checklist.
If those Pinterest wedding checklists absolutely stress you out + your only concern is finding a cool location, your dress and flowers, you’re not ill-prepared or abnormal. You may have a non-traditional approach that not everyone understands. But please don’t let their opinions dictate the trajectory of how you do your wedding day. Remember, this is about you and your person – no one else!
Along the same lines, some people enjoy + strive to do things differently! Hello, where are my enneagram 4s at?!
This is about starting a life together with the one made for you. If you want an exciting adventure + unique experience to kickstart the rest of your life together, then who the heck is stopping you?
The margin is there for you to design your day as simple / extravagant / different / unique to you as ya’ll wish, making another reason why you should elope.
If you are considering eloping, I give you the permission to do so! After going through all the reasons to elope I hope you see that there’s so much freedom there to create an unmatched experience you will remember for the rest of your days.
If eloping sounds AMZNG to you, but you seriously can’t imagine having your nearest + dearest with you, here’s a brief explanation of how awesome intimate weddings can be!!!